Meli was crying in the car this morning. This happened after we had taken our booster shots and were driving to Changi City Point for breakfast. She started talking on the phone and started crying. I can hear her weeping and I think it affected Idris quite a bit.
She only joined us for breakfast during the last 5 mins. And that was after Adam had joined us. Adam had just booked out from his camp. She looked troubled and her eyes were swollen. Never seen her like that. As usual, we were concerned.
After checking out Clarks's shoe store, we drove back home. It was awkward on the trip back home. I stayed back in the car while the rest went up. When I reached home, I saw Su having a talk with her and I joined in.
It was to do with her upcoming wedding.
She mentioned that her aunt has been bad mouthing her. Her aunt talk about how she was wild while she was here, and that she is a loose woman. Her aunt mentioned all this to the potential husband's family. Normally, I do not think this would matter to any of us so much, if not for the fact that her own mother supported the aunt. She also mentioned that this aunt of hers is jealous of her and her family. I detect a sense of Indonesia's Sinetron drama coming along... side note (write a script) This aunt actually wanted to marry off her own daughter, but not to the same guy (huh?) Out of jealousy, this aunt of hers has been bad mouthing her every opportunity she gets. She divulged that while her mom managed to get a house, the aunt did not. A family heirloom thing. She also mentioned that Meli is marrying because of money. (from the aunt's pov, maybe thats understandable) Crazy x2.
My 2 cents were when I said, that perhaps, its her mother's way of not letting this marriage go through. Perhaps its her mother's instinct that the marriage is not in Meli's favour. Perhaps that is why she did what she did and said the things that she did. Meli was upset, saying that its not fair to her, as she is the one making the sacrifice and that now she is the one being punished (caged). Well, if its the mother way of not letting the marriage to take place, it could be her mother's way of getting her out of the cage.
Eh? So she does realise that this marriage is not to her favour. That got me upset. Why in the world would she want to go ahead with the marriage. I think she spoke too soon and now she is having second thoughts. Many second thoughts. It was as this time I blew my top.
I told her, that she told me if she did not marry, she will be considered "expired, she told me, that she is fine with leaving her children behind, she told me that her dad will be given money to start a business once she is married. This is because, once she is married, she would have to stop work, and that is unthinkable as she is currently the only bread winner. As such, it would be understandable how anybody could think about her marrying for money.
I reminded her again, that I and Su have said that we think the marriage is a bad idea. Has she thought about her kids, the potential husband kids and everything else. I reminded her of what Su has said, since this is her third marriage, she must learn from her mistakes and come out on top. Not to demean herself or to short changed her self or even her children.
As for the husband kids, the wives (??) will be taking care of them. Whutt? That is so typical. That is so unacceptable. You have kids and then pass it to your wives to take care and then you marry another? I asked her, whats could possibly be the reasons of this marriage for him? What does he want you to be? A maid, a helper. a sexual partner? WTH! I said, she does not even know the guy. She has never met him recently, and she is alright to go to him? Serious?
Lest one think that I am jealous, I am not. I have never been so clear headed ever since she broke the news about the upcoming nuptials. After a talk with a good friend, I know I have to let her go. She is not mine to control, although I did mentioned to her, again, that if she were my daughter, I would have locked my daughter in the room. For the past few days, I have managed to listen to sad love songs without crying and I have been good to myself, and I know what I told her today is from my head rather that from the heart. I have become less emotional.
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So a few hours later. Su was asleep and I had to prepare dinner. So I called and told her that the least I can do is to share some recipe and cooking techniques so that she could it when she is over there (Sydney). I casually asked her about the potential husband's name as she has not mentioned it me or to us.
"Dia dah mati".
And that was when I started to get emotional again. The last time she said this was when she broke up with previous suitor. I was dumbfounded. Am I supposed to be happy? Sad? I am not too sure. I know that this marriage is important to her yet its not right for her. So I am getting emotional. On one hand, this means that she will be staying, and that makes me happy. But also selfish. The past few days, instead of praying and hoping that she will stay and not leave, I have prayed that whatever decision and whichever path Meli decides to take, may Allah protect her as HE is the all knowing. He is the all giving. I have accepted that she will leave.
She seems to be happier just now, as compared to the past few days. I am happy to see her happy. Its still early. Maybe something will happened and she will change her mind again. But this time, I will already be ready.
